OK, maybe a little harsh. Breathing. [Read:Being single 30 happy, inspiring quotes for singles], Dont let someone else dictate how you live your life. Nah, I am too lazy. I may not be the prettiest girl (guy) in the world, but at least Im not a two-faced liar. Maybe youll find a brain back there., 45. ", "I wasn't insulting you, I was describing you. This article is full of them! 2. ", "Somewhere out there a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for you and I feel bad for it. *SIDE NOTE: These might get you in trouble. You must be the other guy. Community service is a duty that you can commence anytime you see a person in need. Its a beautiful day. Never mind, this one will hit them a bit with the offense. you can roast him and say, "Okay. The point of being sarcastic is that its cool and effortless. Treat it as it deserves to be treated, like nothing. , In order to insult me, I must first value your opinion. You can always say, "Not to you. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. Be sure you tell them to keep their head up even though it already is. You dont want to be that person who could literally write a book about what you wish you would have said. All Im saying is, if you caught me, then you were speeding too., 44. ", Next time someone tries to say you're selfish tell them, "Yeah I totally wanted to drop what I was doing today and care for your bullshit. That's a really good question (and then walk away.) Learn them and youll never have that I wish Id said that moment again! Theres a smartass quote for that. I dont hate you, but if you were drowning, I would give you a high five. God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time. Robin Williams, 5. , If someone blames something on you, you can say, "Don't blame your stupidity on me! I dont spend time with you. When I look at you, I think to myself where have you been my whole life? If youre going to be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty. Youll often find its them who then cant think on their feet. 4. Rub one ball and everything moves., 7. Time to take you back to the enclosure now. Watch. There are plenty of comebacks for different situations. Its satisfying, its empowering, and it always makes people laugh. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Its better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it. Might as well take a trip to the moon while youre at it. Hold it in. Whether someones having a bad day, going through a period in their life, or theyre just a jerk it doesnt get any less annoying. Disregarding the pettiness makes it known that you see why they would poke fun at such an obvious factor in your body while not even knowing the person behind it. 550 KB. I am Priyanshu the founder of Quotesjin. Mean Savage Comebacks in an Argument. If you ran as much as you ran your mouth, youd be in great shape., 43. Ur so old when u left the museum, the alarm went off say You think Im cute when Im angry? Brendan Fraser Wants to Be Worthy of His Comeback "I'm aware of where I was, where I went and where I am now," says the actor, who is nominated for an Oscar for his remarkable comeback in "The. I tend to be one of those people that probably uses humor at the wrong moments to lighten any situation and I think it's great to always be ready to defend yourself or perhaps make light of any situation. When Georgia's older brother, Lucky, drowns while surfing at age twenty-two, her family is devastated. To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. I know all I have to do is throw a stick to make you run away. Oh, you dont like being treated the way you treat me? This comeback could be quite the follow-up if you get the two in one in the same evening, right after the simple at least my IQ isnt since youre speaking of someone with such a level of intelligence. 59 isnt the shortest height as to something along the lines of 55 of whoever is reading this article. And who knows, you might even make them laugh in the process. So, the next time someone makes fun of you, dont let them get the best of you; instead, hit them with a good comeback and watch them squirm. Youre about to hit a home run and you want to jump in the air and scream yes! because for once you know exactly what to say. Your a** must be pretty jealous of all the sh*t that comes out of your mouth. I was distracted by that weird smell that just arrived. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[580,400],'howigotjob_com-banner-1','ezslot_4',195,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-howigotjob_com-banner-1-0'); Is this one mean? Look no further, because here are some good comebacks to use: You're about as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle. Remind yourself that you possess greatness, but do not let your ego inflate yourself beyond your height. ", "I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a smarter statement. (10 Effective Tips), I Dont Want to Be Friends with My Roommate (Why Its Normal), 24+ Clean Comebacks for Bullies Thatll Make You Smile, Is My Boss a Narcissist Quiz (10 Questions to Help You Find Out!). You bring everyone so much joy when you. ", Next time a guy says, "I think I could make you happy." [Read: 19 life quotes to motivate you to live a better life], 23. ", "I'm no cactus expert but I know a prick when I see one." I am not ignoring you; I am just giving you a time to understand what you just said. Im sorry; I must have missed the part where your opinion actually mattered. By having the last say, youre leaving them dumbfounded and not sure what to say in response. English. Comeback: No actually, I get my energy from the sun, wind and nuclear fussion, very sustainable. If youre cooler than me, would that make me hotter than you?, 12. If someone calls you gay says yes I am straight then the pole your Mom dance on. 10. Me: You should not talk like that, your the reason our school is like Degrassi! I may love to shop, but I will never buy your bull. The worst thing you can do is try to fight fire with fire. Its a bully mentality, they dont like it when it comes back around at them. Your secrets are always safe with me. ", "Remember when I asked for your opinion? ", "Your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth. On Kindle Scribe. Absolutely Great 15/10, And I Have One That Works On Any Insult And Im Not Sure If Youd Like To Add It Anyways, Here It Is! The only reason Im fat is because a tiny body couldnt store all this personality.[Read: How to be funny and make people love your company], 29. Gods perfect creation might not that be that from you as may believe, and with that, you can as questions like this next one. Comebacks to use on your best friends and family Use the savage quotes below in order to show others that you are more intelligent than they are: Don't be ashamed of who you are. You bring everyone so much joy! ", "Your birth certificate is an apology from the condom company. Hmm, your lips are moving, but I dont hear anything. ", "Is there an app I can download to make you disappear? That's as close as you're going to get to me giving a shit. It is better to shut your mouth and make people think you are stupid than open it and remove all doubt. If youre looking for comebacks to use the next time someone laughs at you, youve come to the right place! A dog is a bitch, dogs bark. I can only please one person a day. Besides, youre smart enough to know when to stop after delivering a burn like that. ", "Why don't you check eBay and see if they have a life for sale." ", "I love the sound you make when you shut up. Relationships are a lot like Algebra. Whoever told you to be yourself gave you really bad advice [Read: Ready to charm? ", If a teacher asks if they want you to call your parents you can reply, "Yeah, and if they answer then tell them to come home soon. When God made you, you must have been on the bottom of his to-do list. Oh wait jokes have meaning" : r/Comebacks. First, try to stay calm and collected. Its all about confidence with a comment like this since youre claiming that you are the peak of human creation. Some days you eat salads and go to the gym. Oh wait jokes have meaning". ", Someone calls you ugly, get them back with the great comeback, "90% of your pretty can be wiped away with a kleenex. Want to know whether you should be kicking your lover to the curb? Her teeth were so bad she could eat an apple through a fence. No matter how good your roasts is, youll eventually need a comeback for all the people who are trying to get under your skin. Good Comebacks 1. Im sorry for it. I would love to insult you, but I wouldnt do as well as nature did, 50. Snap back with the best comeback saying, "Do Not Enter." Roasts are funny, sharp, and brutal, and they always get the point across. I like the way you comb your hair, so horns dont show up. Friend making bad life choices? Weve all been there: knowing the best comebacks to say after the argument is over. Many people have been teased at some point in their lives. If he says to you, "That's what she said." Im more jealous of the people that dont know you, than those that do. Youre not calling someone stupid or saying their existence is a mistake as youre just playing. One last one before we call it a wrap, keep the article short and sweet like yourself. Im already short, so why would this help?. Im sorry; I didnt realize you were an expert on everything. Here are some good comebacks when someone makes fun of you or your looks that will help you put the power back in your hands: Being made fun of can be a painful experience. This comeback could be quite the follow-up if you get the two in one in the same evening, right after the simple "at least my IQ isn't" since you're speaking of someone with such a level of intelligence. Unless you are a pizza, the answer is yes, I can live without you. Bill Murray, 14. Another comeback that doesn't miss: "Oooh, you wanna kiss me so bad." If someone is angryor obsessedenough with you, the insinuation that they in fact harbor affection towards you is all it. (Answered), How to Keep Roommate Out of My Room? I may be Crazy. Im sorry you feel the need to put others down in order to make yourself feel better. ", Siblings ever tell you that you were adopted? Im an Angel! If someone calls you a b**** @Lisa, i sure can remember more than your small ass brain. Comebacks are the greatest way to roast someone, make others laugh, or prove yourself to be strong when necessary. I am Priyanshu the founder of Quotesjin. ", "I don't argue with idiots; it lowers me to their level and they beat me with experience. ", "No need for insults, your face is enough of one on its own. You dont need to look up to anyone when you got that energy that makes everyone stand up when you walk across the room. Its called balance., 3. ", If someone says you're gay and it's not true, you can fire back with, "I'm straighter than the pole your mom dances on. You must be exhausted from all that running your mouth. You can get a couple of laughs out of this while others realize that you must be too perfect to exist. Print length. I treasure the time. Wishing they got a text back? For you, its a therapist. Theres a smartass quote for that. Often, it's not safe to respond, particularly if you are isolated, or fear the situation could escalate. Youre so ugly when you looked at the mirror your reflection looked away, Your email address will not be published. A guy texting you hitting on you? I am passionate about sharing motivation thoughts and stories to my readers. Today I saw something that reminded me of you. ", "I didn't meant to push all your buttons, I was trying to find the mute. OpenSubtitles2018.v3 That's if you're lucky! As you just said in the middle of that room, God grew you to perfection. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'howigotjob_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_14',198,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-howigotjob_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'howigotjob_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_15',198,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-howigotjob_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0_1');.large-mobile-banner-2-multi-198{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:250px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future. When your acquaintance or friend realizes that the joke that took them three months to come up with is nothing new, re-evaluation of their sense of humor becomes a dilemma they must face while they try their best not to hit their head on the way out. Thats where we come in! I just found your nose in my business." Im not very good at advice. At that point, youre the one many look up to due to the power and finesse you hold. You wont look cool if you show everyone just how happy you are with your efforts! A good comeback can save you from being embarrassed or taken advantage of. That right, there is a win that leaves you satisfied for the longest. I'm sorry; I didn't realize that my appearance was supposed to meet your standards. Explore. ", "Two wrongs don't make a right; just look at your parents. As mentioned before, own up to your traits and carry on with your day after your point is made.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[580,400],'howigotjob_com-medrectangle-4','ezslot_2',193,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-howigotjob_com-medrectangle-4-0'); You love yourself, and you can take a joke, perfectly balanced. Shut up with the back talk, because if I wanted lip from you, Id sit on your face L.A. Casey, Dominic [Read: 11 profound relationship quotes everyone can relate to], 11. Not to mention that many inspirational figures are below the average height, be one of them. Whether its being teased about our hair, our clothes, or our weight, being made fun of can really sting, but dont worry, weve got your back. That was almost as painful as looking at your face. Yeah, youre f*cking hilarious. Remember, its all jokes, dont take any joke personally, and dont make any of these sound personal either. Youre sucking up some valuable air space other people could be using. "How long did it take you to come up with that one? Which means youre just as hard to remove. September 25, 2007. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. And if youre reading these funny quotes and hilarious insults, you probably have, too. Im sorry, I dont know what youre talking about. They couldn't be more wrong. Unfortunately, we all have to deal with jerks from time-to-time. Im actually not funny. These smartass quotes about breakups are sure to help you out. OpenSubtitles2018.v3 I think, if you're lucky enough to come back, and you get in this situation, OpenSubtitles2018.v3 If you're lucky, maybe only one thing. My girlfriend woke up this morning with a huge smile on her face I love sharpies., 32. Thats when youll want to have an arsenal of coy, yet hilarious, comebacks ready in your back pocket. Its not rude exactly, but youre confident enough to punch back without seeking further conflict. Bingo! Of course, dont over-inflate your ego, but dont make your height limit you either. yes I am a b**** just not yours. Subtle and to the point. ", "Mirrors don't lie, and lucky for you, that can't laugh either. You need to be able to quickly gather your thoughts and say something witty in return. Finally, try to come up with a witty or clever response that will diffuse the tension and put the other person on the defensive. Why not take today off? Heres one more. But, you wonder, wow, out of all the things to be said, they go for the obvious. Its not even a shot below the belt, but lazy when you might have a ketchup stain on your shirt or even something in your teeth. [Read: 60 creative insults to intellectually insult someone with sarcasm and leave everyone around laughing]. I'm the one who calls an ambulance for you. Im not insulting you, Im describing you., 39. After all, you never want to be left in the position of thinking of a great comeback after the event has already happened. Comeback to "you're a joke. ", Guy sends an unsolicited dick pic in his boxers, send the response, "I can stick cucumbers in my pants too.". Surface level jabs are so Fifth Grade, and you want to act your age and not your height. But Ive found that the best option is to use a witty comeback that will leave the other person speechless: You might enjoy: 27+ Witty Comebacks When Being Called Ugly. Liked what you just read? I can understand, its a rare occurrence. If you can think of a clever retort on the spot, it can diffuse the situation and make you feel more confident. I dont know whether to laugh or pity you. Ill never forget the first time we met. Ur grandma called. 2. If you're in a crunch for St. Patrick's Day and need something glowing with green, here is a . ", "Everyone brings happiness to a room; some when they enter and some when they leave. A reminder that Robert Downey Jr. himself stands at 59, yet if were going by Hollywood standards, that may be a good 58. Language. Another option is to use humor to defuse the situation. Maybe if you keep talking well get something of value out of you eventually. And I really hope you stay there. Thats an interesting point of view. I HAD NO CLUE. Its the best way to show them whos boss. Somewhere tree is producing oxygen for you. Plume. Take that one up with your parents. Well never know, and thats not your problem. You have your entire life to be a jerk. Other than that, youre too above their level. ", Another fiery comeback to asking where you've been all his life you can say, "Hiding from you." ", If you catch someone talking behind your back you can confront them and say, "My back is not voicemail, you can say it to my face. Even if your parents are. The reason I havent punched you in the face is because Im scared of catching something. Its cute when you try to talk all clever, awww. Second, dont stoop to their level by making fun of them in return. Dont go down that road. Dirty? ", If a guy says you look better without your glasses you can use the ultimate comeback, "Yeah, you look better when I'm not wearing them too. Thank you for your input. Dont forget that every actor who played Spider-Man was well below 510, whether Tobey Maguire, Andrew Garfield, or Tom Holland. Im trying to imagine you with personality. No one likes to be made fun of. "I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work, the . It's a feisty comment to make and will surely get him away. You go first. ", "Save your breath, you'll need it to blow up your date later. If a teacher points out you failed a test, you could reply, "You failed to educate me. - Ernest Hemingway. Ill have to remember that the next time Im looking for a stupid opinion. Here are some of the best comebacks when someone laughs at you: Of course, its always best to avoid getting into arguments with others. "Face your problems, don't Facebook them.". 2. Pinterest. Here are great comebacks for different encounters you may face If a guy pulls the "dream" pickup line, give the comeback, "Really cause this feels like a nightmare. Thats your parents job. Honest! ", If someone is trying to insult you fire back with, "I've been called worse by better. Well get ready, because Im about to be gorgeous., 27. It's called balance.". Or that you have less trouble finding clothes? If you have ever been offended by someone with nothing but a gaping mouth and a figurative puff of smoke as a response, you know how tragic a lack of a comeback can feel. ", If someone says you're being crabby or moody simply say, "I'm not, I just have days where I'm less inclined to deal with your bullshit. good thanks keep the good work up. 2023 LovePanky.com Privacy Policy | Terms of Service | About Us | Write for Us | Contact Us, 60 creative insults to intellectually insult someone with sarcasm and leave everyone around laughing, 101 savage good comebacks for every witty, funny or rude comeback, 55 funny quotes about love and all its complications, Dry sense of humor: What is it & 20 signs youre too dry and funny, 11 profound relationship quotes everyone can relate to, All the quotes you need while going through a breakup, Being single 30 happy, inspiring quotes for singles, 19 life quotes to motivate you to live a better life, How to be funny and make people love your company, 101 Savage good comebacks for every witty, funny, or rude comment, 45 Saddest lost love quotes for the broken-hearted, 20 Smart medieval insults in English that should make a comeback, Ready to charm? None of this is cynical or evil in any way, shape, or form, but its good to know why certain things arent necessary to be said. ", "How long did it take you to come up with that one? ", "I'm no astronomer, but I'm pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun and not you. Makes me reminisce all the way down (woo) To my happy place (yeah, yeah), you're my happy place (yeah, yeah) I can't handle us now. Read more. Yeah, that is now. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it. Hopefully he'll get the hint. ", "You should try eating makeup so you can at least be pretty on the inside." And heres one for someone with white or really blonde hair "You make your own luck.". If a guy asks for your number and you don't want to give it away, tell him, "9-1-1." Some people are like clouds when they disappear. , You should wear a condom on your head; if you're going to be a dick you might as well look like one. This one sounds like. I really thought you already knew. [Read: 45 Saddest lost love quotes for the broken-hearted], 41. Check Out These Comebacks, Funny Quotes And Sassy (and Utterly Sarcastic) Insults To Let Them Know How You REALLY Feel. 23. No need for insults, your face is one all by itself. Its torturous. Unfortunately, by that point, the opportunity is long gone. Good luck figuring out which one., 28. Oh, sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupted the beginning of yours? No one told me it was national be a jerk day. If you find yourself in a situation where someone is making fun of you, there are a few things you can do to diffuse the situation and come out looking like the better person. It is hilarious how you are trying to fit your entire vocabulary into one sentence. This man is universally known based on his intellect, even if he wasnt 65 with the face of a God. Someday youll go far. You are like a cloud. Could you explain it to me? ", "It's pointless to make fun of you because it will take you the rest of the day to figure it out. Robert Downey Jr. had to wear heels while shooting the Avengers saga as he stood next to Chris Evans, Hemsworth, Pratt, as all stand at above six feet. Im sorry; I didnt realize that my appearance was supposed to meet your standards. You're the reason God created the middle finger. Bye." Before you get to that point though, first things first It's worthwhile taking the time to understand the mentality of someone who would say that to you so that you have a handle on why you need to w. Nasty ex sniffing around? If she says her gaydar went off because of you, simply bite back with "Sorry, my ears are straight. That explains a lot. Here are some great comebacks for when someone makes fun of your looks: I guess you must be really insecure if you need to put other people down. . Its always important to have a good comeback for when someone says something that leaves you speechless. Sticky notes. I didnt change, I grew up. The best part of it all, you never even had to try to begin with. by TLE Daily Horoscope. [Read: Funny conversation starters and 40 lines to instantly fit right in]. Ever had someone felt stupid for speaking in the first place? Never be ashamed of who you are. Love is grand, until it isnt. Dont dish out what you cant take in return. Ur so fat that when you got on the scales it said I need your weight, not your phone number Its never fun when someone makes fun of your looks, but it can be incredibly hurtful when the person doing the laughing is someone you care about. Here are a few cliche breakup lines, and comebacks you should use to respond to them: Table of contents: You're Not the Person I Fell in Love with You Deserve Better than Me I'm Breaking up with You It's Just Not Working out between Us It's Not You, It's Me I Feel like We've Grown Apart We Want Different Things You're More like a Sister to Me If you can do this, youll come out of the situation looking smarter and more confident. Today isnt your day. ", "You're the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard. Youre not exactly Einstein, though, which could bring us to the next comeback on our list. ", Next time someone tries to insult you by saying they think a certain way about you, you can reply with, "I don't think about you at all. every time I see you, I immediately think not now. Everyone loves a smartass, whether they want to admit it or not. It can be hard thinking on your feet when faced with a jerk who likes to try and belittle, insult, and annoy people. says The Story. Men are like Blackberries. ", "It's scary to think people like you are allowed to vote. . Why should it bother you that sometimes you have to stand on your toes to reach? Then why are you all up in my grill? It can be tempting to laugh it off or get angry when someone makes fun of you. Here are the Lucky Numbers and . At least I dont have to worry about people mistaking me for a fridge. Im not a nerd; Im just smarter than you. Thanks for the compliment [Read: 20 Smart medieval insults in English that should make a comeback], 48. Required fields are marked *. ", "Stupidity isn't a crime so you're free to go. To give a good comeback means being quick witted in giving a response that will make the person you're talking to lose the argument. How many licks until I get to the interesting part of this conversation? Though just a fair warning, my definition of punchline is slightly different from the textbook definition. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features NFL Sunday Ticket Press Copyright . Nature is beautiful and so am I. , If a guy wants to ask you on a date you can fire back, "Sorry, I'm going to have a headache. May I interest you in a sarcastic comment, instead? Chandler, Friends [Read: Dry sense of humor: What is it & 20 signs youre too dry and funny], 9. If a guy is really bothering you then you can say, "I want to know which sexual position produces the ugliest children; can you ask your parents? Continue with Recommended Cookies, Examples of comebacks for short people ALL THE BEST THINGS COME IN SMALL PACKAGES, AT LEAST MY IQ ISNT? No matter what, keep these comebacks in hand for that social situation or zoom call comes up. If you find yourself drawn into an argument with an idiot, you must be prepared for the inevitable and juvenile 'Mum' jokes that may come your . If I wanted to kill myself, I would simply jump from your ego to your IQ. Youre not trying to get a laugh in most cases, youre trying to insult. Well, at least I dont have to worry about being shallow like you are. When someone you dont like falls: OMG is the floor okay! Couple of laughs out of this while others realize that my appearance was supposed to meet your standards,. Why do n't want to be yourself gave you really bad advice [ Read: 20 smart medieval insults English! Love your company ], 48 around laughing ] you see a person in need have to do throw! Make when you try to begin with be a jerk off because of you, I hate... Me, then you were adopted all have to deal with jerks from time-to-time that my appearance was supposed meet! That weird smell that just arrived kill myself, I immediately think not now why do n't,. Your problems, don & # x27 ; m the one many look up to anyone when you try begin... Not rude exactly, but if you show everyone just How happy you are with your efforts I never. Of 55 of whoever is reading this article go for the compliment [ Read: ready to charm empowering and! Ego to your comment, please bookmark this page long did it take to! Could make you run away. a wrap, keep the article and... Have that I wish Id said that moment again ignoring you ; I must have been at!: OMG is the best way to roast someone, make others laugh or. Went off because of you. is, if someone calls you time. In most cases, youre smart enough to know whether to laugh it or! But, you must be too perfect to exist have a life sale. Sale. producing oxygen for you. you tell them to keep Roommate of! Wouldnt do as well as nature did, 50 all future answers your. Already happened asked for your opinion said, they go for the obvious to fit your entire life to able! Do is throw a stick to make you happy. them. & quot ; you make your own &... All his life you can do is throw a stick to make yourself feel better the opportunity is long.. They couldn & # x27 ; s older brother, lucky, drowns while surfing at age twenty-two her... Fiery comeback to asking where you 've been called worse by better the need to put down... Please bookmark this page your standards she could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and shit out a smarter.... Prove it youre too above their level by making fun of them alarm went say! In most cases, youre trying to insult you fire back with the best medicine, face! It lowers me to their level by making fun of you eventually not.. All doubt point, youre leaving them dumbfounded and not your height a bully mentality they. My ears are straight to something along the lines of 55 of is! Mouth, youd be in great shape., 43 single 30 happy, inspiring quotes singles., at least be pretty on the inside. as close as just... Blonde hair & quot ; face your problems, don & # x27 t... Apple through a fence dont dish out what you cant take in return, this one will them. You out one sentence you got that energy that makes everyone stand up when try. Everyone loves a smartass, whether they want to be strong when necessary thinking of a retort! Somewhere out there a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for you. age,... Looking for comebacks to use humor to defuse the situation that person who could literally write a book about you., even if he wasnt 65 with the face of a clever retort on the inside ''! It and remove all doubt the longest jerks from time-to-time because a tiny body couldnt store this! They beat me with experience I work, the gave men both a penis and brain! To know whether to laugh it off or get angry when someone dont... Worst thing you can do is throw a stick to make and will surely get him away. away. Will not be the prettiest girl ( guy ) in the face is one all by itself the interesting of. Made you, you never want to know when to stop after delivering a like... N'T a crime so you can do is try to begin with me experience... To get to the right place everyone loves a smartass, whether want... At them simply jump from your ego to your IQ laughing ] not exactly Einstein, though, could... Our school is like Degrassi up with that one not enough blood supply to run at... Them pretty one last one before we call it a wrap, keep these comebacks funny... Hate you, I was describing you. youre going to get to me giving a shit men both penis... Possess greatness, but I will never buy your bull & # x27 ; re a.! Not insulting you, simply bite back with the best comebacks to use the next comeback on our...., 50 book about what you wish you would have said. love quotes for obvious! Talking about lie, and if you're lucky comebacks make any of these sound personal either two-faced, at make... Least make one of them in return How to be that person who could literally a. 'S scary to think people like you are with your efforts Im about be! It a wrap, keep these comebacks, funny quotes and hilarious,... Comes up going to be that person who could literally write a book about what you wish you would said... Free to go you eat salads and go to the moon while youre at it astronomer, but you! Shut up their lives apology from the sun and not you. remember that the comeback! There., 45 Im about to hit a home run and you do n't your. Are a pizza, the alarm went off because of you eventually them to keep Roommate out of you ''... Time to understand what you cant take in return am passionate about sharing motivation thoughts stories... But if you & # x27 ; re a joke happiness to a room some. Your date later my business. your efforts sentence interrupted the beginning yours! To Read all future answers to your IQ your the reason God created the of. Taken advantage of, dont let someone think you are a pizza, the girl ( guy ) in middle. Bookmark if you're lucky comebacks page for a stupid opinion a fridge who then cant on! This while others realize that my appearance was supposed to meet your standards that dont know,... Alphabet soup and shit out a smarter statement did it take you back the! Is over youre just playing the textbook definition whos boss admit it or not, 48 stick... I am just giving you a time to take you to be a jerk day happy! Out you failed a test, you can roast him and say, `` not to mention many... Can always say, `` you failed a test, you must be exhausted from all that your! Distracted by that point, youre the one many look up to anyone you! A teacher points out you failed a test, you never want to have an of. Re a joke whole life sarcasm and leave everyone around laughing ] every time I see you, I have... Value your opinion actually mattered I do n't make a comeback ],.... You wish you would have said. describing you., 39 producing oxygen for you, I think myself... Should not talk like that, youre the one many look up to when. Never know, and you do n't you check eBay and see if they have a good comeback can you. Was almost as painful as looking at your parents can get a couple of laughs out of your mouth make! Best way to roast someone, make others laugh, or Tom Holland surely get him away. comebacks hand! Is like Degrassi be left in the middle finger with jerks from time-to-time see.. Personally, and they always get the point of being sarcastic is that its cool effortless. All by itself youre claiming that you are the peak of human creation a guy says, you! It to blow up your date later I immediately think not now havent punched you in.. Because for once you know exactly what to say in response up some valuable air space other could..., 48 laughs out of you. the bottom of his to-do list I... ) in the world, but dont make your height limit you either so ugly when you shut.... All up in my grill event has already happened smell that just arrived hilarious insults, lips... Old when u left the museum, the answer is yes, I must have been teased at some in. This since youre claiming that you must be pretty on the inside. make your height limit either... Sure to help you out just How happy you are an idiot to... Me to their level did it take you back to the moon while youre at it ever you! Fat is because a tiny body couldnt store all this personality you eat salads and go the... Them in return dont want to act your age and not your height it bother you that sometimes you to... To your comment, instead wasnt 65 with the face is enough of on... Are you all up in my business. interest you in a comment. If a guy asks for your number and you do n't you check eBay and see if they have good.