MAXINE: OH STOP! Sometimes puppet shows are sad. So, I have an idea. ADAM: Barbara, run! LYDIA: No, it was adorable. BARBARA: I think so! SO WE MIGHT AS WELL WALK THROUGH SOME WALLS, 'CAUSE ADAM, WE'RE READY AS WE'LL EVER GET, I GOTTA GET RIGHT OUTSIDE MY COMFORT ZONE. The man next to me This is so wrong, your my employee, but also my lover! These are the biggest changes that . Complimentary and Deeply Discounted Shows. CHARLES: Where is the shrimp? Its not a fad! Hibiscus_Flower. That never happens. LYDIA: You guys want your house back, right? First published Apr 06, 2020. They can never take it away! We invisibles have to stick together! If I had known. MONSTER BEETLEJUICE: We come for your daughter, Chuck! BEETLEJUICE: Thats it! CHARLES: I just have to get the chalk. LYDIA: The Netherworld? And you dont exist. I can no longer stand to be used like a puppet between two deceitful worlds. BEETLEJUICE: Well, yeah, because youre not recently deceased. Here you got a solid plan B option. OUR TROUBLES ALL ENDED ON THE DAY THAT WE BEFRIENDED HIM. You are like ice! We used to make the haunted houses in the garage, but, in the summer so no one expected it. Theyre in the room with us. With an irreverent book, an astonishing set, and a score that . You give mea bonerhere, its a femur. I'm talkin' jump-scares, the jerky Japanese ghost-walk. But, its worth it. LYDIA: Hes the loneliest guy I know. BARBARA: Were just a normal couple. Boo. Those are the guest sheets! Mr. DELIA: I dont think thats how knock knock jokes work. BEETLEJUICE: Nothing, so your dad wants to suck me into this fancy box. No! All you gotta do is say my name! Find some interesting quotes from when she felt alone here, they will make you think! BEETLEJUICE: NO, WHAT FILLS YOU WITH RAGE? Its a little crooked. I changed a lot. BARBARA: You were right. BEETLEJUICE: Well, it doesnt matter if you say it Adam, THEY HAVE TO BE ALIVE! I see you. BEETLEJUICE: NO! Do not be afraid. Do you think you would mind leaving and never coming back? LYDIA: I dont want your help. Look, I know things have been difficult-. Like these weirdos. Oh I don't see anything -- Aah! Sucks-Yes! And choosing the people you wanna share it with! BEETLEJUICE: I KNOW THAT BEGGARS CAN'T BE CHOOSERS, THE MAITLANDS, CHOIR: BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE. If you're a fan of Beetlejuice the Musical on Broadway, then you probably know Elizabeth Teeter. Eh, it was worth a shot. LYDIA: But were moving forward!, right? And that makes me feel oh god, I actually feel! Theyre chasing me! Beetlejuice : I'm Lydia Deetz and I'm of sound mind. Are you alright? Maybe nothing has to change. IM TIRED OF TRYIN TO IRON OUT MY CREASES, HE WANTS ME TO SMILE AND CLAP LIKE A PERFORMING SEAL, YOU WONT BELIEVE THE MESS THAT WEVE BECOME, ARE YOU RECEIVING? Now, we have two days to transform this old house into the flagship model home of my new gated community. CHARLES: Except brains. BEETLEJUICE: DID I SAY NETHERWORLD? BEETLEJUICE: DON'T YOU WANNA SEE DAD SUFFER? ANY GHOST CAN DO THAT IN LESS THAN ONE LESSON. And I want everyone here to know it. Let's haunt this bitch! But, if youre going to live like a ghost, you have to follow the rules. But youre sexy. LYDIA: Really? Alright. My baby's got a body that doesnt quit and a brain that doesnt work! JUNO: My name is Juno! BEETLEJUICE: Oh yeah. Now Charles, weve not yet discussed my fee. I orbit. She held her lip between her teeth and went to find him at once. I sense your touch. LYDIA: Mother nearest, heart how dearest. Let me ask you a question. Classic Bait and Switch. Beetlejuice DC Script - Free download as PDF File (.pdf), Text File (.txt) or read online for free. Theyre queens! BEETLEJUICE: Hi there, ahahaha! She needs stability. BEETLEJUICE: WHATEVER IT TAKES TO MAKE 'EM GO CRAZY, 'CAUSE YOU'VE GOT SOME EVIL DEEP DOWN INSIDE YOU, YOU'VE GOTTA WORK GOTTA HAUNT TILL IT HURTS THROUGH THE NIGHT, AND GIVE THOSE GUYS THE FRIGHT OF THEIR LIVES. MISS ARGENTINA: DID YOU EVEN READ THE HANDBOOK? "The Swamp" in The Acting Coach Approach: 48 Monologues for Kids . And nothing else exists. GET OUTTA MY WAY. GIRL SCOUT: Okay Well- Maybe I should come back another time when your parents are home? There are people downstairs. Were going to change that (rings triangle.) Im gonna need some help! Keep it away from your sensitive parts. EVEN, LIKE, A TAX ATTORNEY WOULD'VE BEEN BETTER, SOMEBODY WITH GRAVITAS SOMEBODY TO FEAR WHO, ADAM: Excuse me, Mr. Beetlejuice we can kind of hear you. It's a gold mine! BARBARA: Lydia, why did Beetlejuice give that to you? ADAM: I know, I know, me too. (a beat.) LYDIA: What? LYDIA: I have been alone since my mom died! You! BEETLEJUICE: Looks like we're not invisible anymore! Now we both got Dead Moms! Scott Brown You brought him to life, just so you could kill him? Own that. I wanna go home. The Maitlands and Beetlejuice, Lydia thinks, can bring her to the netherworld to see her mother once more. BEETLEJUICE: Hey! LYDIA: (to CHARLES.) Never change! Now, we dont have a lot of time. You saw that monster! Home Explore Songbook Top Artists Groups Apps Get VIP. It was all rundown and we didnt know if we were going to get through it. BEETLEJUICE: And I know that now. BEETLEJUICE: Sorry, kid. Adam, wanna do the honors? (THE MAITLANDS nod.) Which does not come easy. These ghosts are gonna make us a fortune! Just put me in . . In Michael McDowell's script, the adorable Maitlands' death scene is quite graphic and traumatic they get trapped in a car and scream to no avail as they're shown slowly drowning. BEETLEJUICE: DON'T BE SO VANILLA WOULD A LITTLE ANGER KILL YA? Step right up and lets play a game that I like to call RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!. CHARLES:Yes, but we have to move forward! The oldest trick in the book. Cmon. So if you wanna save Barbara, then I need you to marry me! And Lydia, I think Ill miss you most of all. They become caught up in the supernatural elements and try to get Lydia to realize what she really needs the most. Hey Lydia, check this out Dance break! THE MAITLANDS: (ghostly.) After Adam and Barbara realized that Lydia wasn't like the rest of her family, they didn't want Betelgeuse to scare her anymore. TAKE YOUR PLACES I WANT SCARY FACES NOW GO! Once he realizes this house is haunted, well have to leave! Maybe, we can help each other! BEETLEJUICE: Theyre taking it to the dump and without me theyre going to do that to everything! CHARLES: Delia! LYDIA: I dont know! 24m. Whats a matter Chuck? Do the research! BEETLEJUICE: Hey! BEETLEJUICE: You heard the lady! Lets draw the door. And its not fair, you know? 3."My whole life is a dark room. ADAM: CHEFS WHO USE TOO MUCH SAGE WHEN THEY MAKE BEURRE NOISETTE, BEETLEJUICE: WELL, THERE'S LOTS THERE TO USE, TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND GIVE ME YOUR BEST PRIMAL SCREAM, BEETLEJUICE: TRY IT AGAIN MAYBE THIS TIME PRETEND LIKE YOU MEAN IT. Can I bring her back? DELIA: Charles, maybe we should just tell her about us. BEETLEJUICE: No, she did! Girl, just say it three times in a row. Sayonara. Can you believe people actually lived here? Whos there? BEETLEJUICE: Pepperoni, mushrooms and snakes! LYDIA: YeahItd be terrible if we all let each other down, DELIA: (Rings Triangle.) Then you won't believe how far I'll go. Devoted wife to Charles, beloved mother to Lydia. I know that my name's on the marquee, but youre going to have to watch a new show. CHARLES: What? We only provide suggested audition monologues or songs for an individual character if our system finds content that matches a character's traits. Keep it coming gentleman! And I fear for my safety around you. Because dead or alive, you dont got somebody who really gets you, then youre going to feel lonely and worthless and youll never reach your goal weight because you eat when youre sad this guy knows what Im talking about. Start reading. ADAM: Again, we do not want to kill anyone! But together, well make him see! LYDIA: Because, youre not scary. Scripture tells us, Sorrow not. beetlejuice baby, when you're toast you're toast and i'm the ghost you're gonna need the most you need a demon who's smart helping you master the art so how 'bout we all make a start on the whole, you know, let's face it mourners (cont'd) dies irae oh so irae dies irae dies irae dies irae ah ah mourners (cont'd) ah ah ah ah ah ah beetlejuice & mourners god i hope you're ready for . And Im not gonna let you take it from her! I'm on the bench, but Coach. CHARLES: About that I thought that after everything weve been through Well, I just thought that both of us could use a fresh start. SPIN! You'll know that I've abandoned hope. BEETLEJUICE: No. In the world of the dead? (snaps photo.) BEETLEJUICE: Well then what am I supposed to do! having plummeted off the Winter River Bridge. DELIA: The b is silent, but it still stings. ADAM Hey old girl! A toast to my father and his all important business! We can't start a family in a house with creaky floorboards! JUNO: I shouldve guessed youd be mixed up in all of this! All you gotta do is say my name. I'm sure Dad will ruin it. From A Chorus Line to You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown, we've got plenty of monologues from musicals to choose from! I had it open for a second but the Maitlands slammed it shut. I was like, Pick a lane, Bill!. We have two days to make this a model home. (BEETLEJUICE possesses BARBARA and ADAM.). ADAM: Oh! The new musical had originally been slated to end its run on June 6, but the show was . CHARLES: You think this is what I want? THE MAITLANDS: (creepily.) she utters this indignant monologue. What am I doing? She needs somebody to help her get past all this. GIRL SCOUT: THIS IS IT THE DAY I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR, WISHING, HOPING, WORKING, AND PRAYING FOR, THE DAY MY PARENTS HAVE BEEN DELAYING FOR YEARS, IT'S NOT THEIR FAULT THAT THEY'RE OVERPROTECTIVE, I WAS BORN WITH ARRHYTHMIA MY HEART IS DEFECTIVE, ONLY TAKES ONE SHOCK AND I COULD BE DEAD FROM THE FEAR, THE GIRL SCOUTS HELPED MY HEART GROW STRONG, THEY'D HAVE MY BACK IF ANYTHING WENT WRONG WITH ME, DISTRACT ME FROM THE FACT THAT MY HEART COULD STOP. We will. Beetlejuice: [covers Lydia's mouth with his hand] She's a little bit nervous. Tagged: Rhymes, Juice, Loose. WE'RE MORE THAN DETRITUS WE'RE FINALLY ALIVE! But we just have to hold onto each other and live through it. I thought she was talking about us. I have some good news. ADAM: Kill?!??!? I WANT SOMETHING TO BELIEVE IN, OR IM DONE TAKE ME WHERE MY SOUL CAN RUN, OR ILL BE IN MY BEDROOM WAKE ME WHEN IM TWENTY-ONE, WHATEVER IT TAKES TO MAKE HIM SAY YOUR NAME. Thats the problem! Tagged: Whorehouse, Anxious. CHARLES: Do you hear that, Delia? CHARLES: Lydia, I have asked Delia to marry me. And you heard what he said, any ghost can do that possession stuff. PRIEST: In times like these, we have no words, we have only each other. Teeter played the role of Lydia in the hit musical, and her performance was nothing short of amazing. Welcome! ADAM: I know! What else do you have to do, Mami? Beetlejuice will play its first show on Friday, April 8, 2022, it was announced Monday. You know what it feels like to get everything you thought you ever wanted, but still feel like no one will every love you? Your moms dead, shes in the Netherworld. ALL: CREEPY OLD GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY! Oh my god! BARBARA: I was too! Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!" IT'S SHOWTIME! Strangers. CHARLES: No, you have failed. Barbara! ADAM: Well, why do we have to make them say it? CHARLES: Lydia! CHARLES: Hey! Barbara, the pig! Im his fifth wife! OTHO: So glad that you asked. Join StageAgent today and unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. Make My Millennium!". ALL GUY, GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY GUY, GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY GUY, GUY, BEETLEJUICE: AHHHHHHH!! But I (a beat.) What an effervescent young lady you are. She would start drinking, and Id be like Mom stop drinking. BEETLEJUICE: (snaps fingers and the Sandworm attacks) Thats why not! 119. Its about love! who adapted the movie into the musical's script, . ENSEMBLE: Daylight come and we wan' go PASTOR: (spoken) In times like these, we have no words We have only each other Today we come together to mourn the passing of Emily Deetz Devoted wife . So mean. But heres the good news! And also, I dont model anymore. And speaking of, right on time! Charles! Before Juno sees you. *Our system only provides suggested monologues or songs for select characters if we have matching monologues and song information in our database. INT. Right now, just outside the walls of this house, nestled in the hatch back of my Toyota Prius, is a mysterious object of my own design. Now heres the problem. LYDIA: Im alone. Thank you for being here. However, there was no reasoning with the spirit, but Adam and Barbara had a slight advantage in the fact that they weren't stuck in Adam's miniature town. LYDIA: Mom?! Suggested Audition Pieces Auditioning for Lydia? The musical premiered at the National Theatre, Washington, D.C. in October 2018, prior to opening on Broadway at the Winter Garden Theatre on April 25, 2019. Its like a green card thing! Draw a door, go home! Sophia Anne Caruso, the talented young star of "Beetlejuice," surprised a lot of the musical . Where the contestants suck and the host is very angry, because his plan to become alive just went balls up! [speaks in Lydia's voice] Beetlejuice: I'm Lydia Deetz and I'm of sound mind. Oh my god! Hes here! ADAM: Oh yeah? Lets find out! (Charles and Delia try a Hi-five) Oh, so close! Did I mention that my moms a demon? Dad, no. BEETLEJUICE: Oh, I don't live here, I'm dead! And that is why you need me! People dont read. Right now, no matter what I do, I cannot affect the world of the living. BARBARA: Fool your friends, fun at parties I DID IT! Hold on! Im not sure youre equipped. BEETLEJUICE: Why does everyone KEEP LEAVING ME! LYDIA: Dead Mom? Shes impossible. Gain full access to show guides, character breakdowns, auditions, monologues and more! No no no no no. If requested, here are a few audition monologues for Beetlejuice: "MacKenzie #1" in Audition Arsenal for Men in Their 20s . LYDIA: You know what? BEETLEJUICE: Well then, go fuck yourself. BEETLEJUICE: Oh, not so fast Mr. Soulbox. THIS IS GONNA BE SO GOOD! ADAM: So, Lydia since you can see us, let me get right to the point. Did you think I wasnt coming back? I died with this sash. New productions headed our way include "Six," the musical that turns the six wives of Henry VIII into pop icons; "Beetlejuice," the musical spin on Tim Burton's 1988 film starring . BARBARA: We are not aluminum siding people! We are invisible. In a haunted house, all alone! See? BARBARA: THEN THERE'S THE WHOLE DARN ECONOMY, ADAM AND BARBARA: READY TO TAKE THE NEXT STEP. BEETLEJUICE: Oh yeah? It was like the perfect dad joke! (DELIA and CHARLES make out on the table.). Of course I might have to get a little mean. (to audience.) ; Body Horror: Having his head cut off, then stretching his nose out while shoving his hand into the back of his head and growing eyes on his fingers. You know? ADAM: I gotta say hun, were lucky. 1."I am alone. CHARLES: Wouldnt even know where to start. BARBARA: It was SO hard! Im crying because Im so happy. (a beat.) The happiness is completely gone, and that just makes me really sad. LYDIA: Dad, how long do we have to stay here? Dont you wanna get these people out of your house? GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD. And here we are sneaking around like two teenagers at a church picnic. this hilarious musical tells the story of lydia deetz, a strange and unusual teenager whose whole life changes when she meets a recently deceased couple and a demon with a thing . My name is Lydia Deetz. We used to live here. I FOUND MY FREQUENCY CRYSTALS SPEAK TO ME, EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, THERE ARE SPIRITUAL GUIDES ABOVE LOOK UP AND SEE 'EM, JUST LISTEN TO THE MELODY THE UNIVERSE SINGS, 'CAUSE EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON, THE UNIVERSE IS JUST THE CONTENTS OF TIME, MATTER AND SPACE, LYDIA: NINETY-ONE BILLION LIGHT-YEARS ACROSS AND THE EARTH'S A SMALL PLACE, THE PACIFIC ISLANDS ARE SINKING BUT NEGATIVE THINKING IS HARDLY THE CAUSE, YOU THINK LIFE IS ALL UNICORNS AND RAINBOWS 'CAUSE YOU'RE BORED, LYDIA: AND POSITIVITY IS A LUXURY THAT FEW CAN AFFORD, DELIA: NO NO NO! It's just like you said, you dont always get it, but youre a part of it. All rights go to Tim Burton and creator. Thats why Im doing this. Beetlejuice is a musical with music and lyrics by Eddie Perfect and book by Scott Brown and Anthony King.It is based on the 1988 film of the same name.The story concerns a deceased couple who try to haunt the new inhabitants of their former home and call for help from a devious bio-exorcist ghost named Betelgeuse (after the star; the name is pronounced and often spelled "Beetlejuice"), who is . New phone, who dis? This sappy subplot robs the musical of macabre and fits the story as well as O.J.'s glove. invisible nd you can change all of that. YES I DO! (giggle) Just kidding! I cancelled the exorcist, and Ive hired someone better. What does that mean? She goes back into the room. Were going to play a little game! LYDIA: I dont know how! OKAY! Dad theres ghosts! DELIA: I dont see race. LYDIA: Dad came back for me? Dont you remember when we moved in? 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